Thursday, March 01, 2007

It’s time to make an official announcement I suppose.

I feel like hell. My pants don’t fit. I’m gassy, and for the love of GOD, please don’t anyone mention food products coming from cows, pigs, chickens, fish, lamb…anything but vegetables and fruit really. Watermellon is Ok. You can talk about watermelon. Mmmm…watermelon. And lemons. Oooh, tomato soup. Ew. No. Scratch the tomato soup. That was Tuesday.

Yeah. You guessed it. I’m pregnant.

If you are one of the people in my life who deserved to hear about this from me, perhaps in a phone call, or a face to face visit. I’m sorry. Really. But it’s my second pregnancy. And I feel like crap. Did I mention that? So, pretty much, I just wanted to be able to whine about the craptastic parts on my blog. And in my hormotional state, that’s taking precedent over cutesy announcement type messaging. So, consider yourself technologically savvy. You heard about my kocked-upedness in the blogosphere.

Besides, if you’d gotten a call from me you’d probably be wondering if I was even excited or happy about this joyous news. I assure you. I am. We are. Sweet Pea especially. It’s just that, and I may have mentioned this, I’m not feeling so hot. I’d describe it in greater detail, but that would make me dry heave into my garbage can. And I think my co-workers are getting at tich tired of that bit. Soooo…

Uh, the details are that I’m nearly 7 weeks along. I know, that’s like a hiccup in the grand scheme of things. And those of you who know my history are probably a little surprised about my spilling the beans so soon. The thing is that I’m not very good at keeping secrets anyway. And, have I told you yet that I’m experiencing some nausea? Well, I am. So in addition to my lovely pallor and irregular behaviors (i.e. covering my nose and mouth and running away from anything with a scent. Except lemons. Mmm…Lemons….), I’m wearing these ridiculous grey terry cloth wristband thingys that are supposed to help with the nausea. They are an acupressure thing, and I’m not sure if they work but I’m sure as hell not taking them off to find out. Anyway, all of those above things make it obvious. And so one by one people start to figure it out. And then it’s like you have to tell Mary because Lucy knows, and if Mary knows then she might tell Alice who would be hurt if she didn’t hear it from you, and blah blah blah.

So again, here it is for all the world to see. I’m pregnant. Woo.

Here are a couple of things I’m noticing about pregnancy, part deux.

My stomach heard me tell my mother on the phone that I got two pink lines. At that exact moment, there was an audible sigh and my body from the shoulders down assumed the exact shape it took about 18 weeks to get to the first time around. Things that had regained some perk are now sagging. Things that had gotten toned are now flabby. Things that were as flat as they were going to get now look decidedly Easter Egg shaped. My doctor says it’s about your bowels being all messed up and muscle memory. I concur. My bowels are in fact, all messed up. And my muscles did a little dance of joy at the memory of getting to hang it all out.

Mr. Golightly is a lot more sympathetic to the morning sickness thing. I think this time around he realizes the long term impact this is likely to have on his sex life. And so he wants to make sure that in nausea free moments I’m looking at him lovingly. Just in case. Not a bad strategy really. And at least we’re both pulling for some nausea free moments.

There is a small person who is not at all concerned with making sure I am feeling pampered and well rested in my delicate condition. I worried about this going in, but was somehow distracted from focusing on what a challenge it would present. I was also not aware that said small person would be filling the role of Early Pregnancy Commentator. Announcing things like, “Mommy, you made a stinky smell like poop.” And, “Mommy is the baby in your tummy making you throw up? Go put your bracelets on and feel better.”

The thought of twins was mildly frightening last time. Now I have terrifying dreams about nursing two giant babies with full sets of teeth.

Speaking of twins. Sweet Pea has made the prediction that she is going to have sisters. Two of them. She also thinks that she can communicate telepathically with our friend Sadie. I asked Sadie if she’s been having any obscure dreams or random thoughts involving mac and cheese and Disney Princesses, and she says no. So let’s all hope that Sweet Pea is not going to have to start the Psychic Friends Toddler Network.

(Oh, and I had an ultrasound and at first glance there only appears to be one little lima bean in there. One tiny little lima bean with an awful lot of power over my hormones.)

Anyway. There you go. There will be a new person in the universe sometime around mid October. And given the prototype, we’re expecting great things.

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