Sunday, August 31, 2008

Ok. This kid is CUUUTE. And it's not just some randome You Tube posting. This came straight from his dad. Methinks they should be checking out "Lifestyles of the Parents of the Rich and Famous" rockstar version.

Do you wanna rock?


Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Confidential to Skinny Mom. You know who you are.

Just because you CAN crawl into the playplace thingy at McDonalds doesn't mean you should. The rest of us moms have our kids convinced that McDonalds strictly forbids anyone over 8 years old to cross the big plastic threshold. So what the !*&!$ am I supposed to tell my kid after she sees you scampering around like a spider monkey? And by the way, haven't you noticed that that thing is disgusting and smells like pee?

And what the hell is your vegan-yoga-pants-wearing-size-two-trained-for-the-NY Marathon-while-pushing-my-3-month-old-in-a-jogger-stroller ass doing at McDonalds anyway? Didn't you see Super Size Me? You're totally not supposed to feed your kids that crap.



Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I’m feeling so…I don’t know. Un Me right now. It’s not all bad though. It’s partly about trying new things. But other parts are just kind of funky. As in, in-a-funk-y. Not like groovalicious. Maybe it’s the changing seasons or something. We have had some very uncharacteristically cool days here. Fall doesn’t usually start to creep in until mid October in these parts. Perhaps I’m in early mourning over the end of summer. (It will be hot again in a few days and then I can bitch about that instead.)

But anyway. Yeah. Who is this girl? Why don’t her pants fit? How come she is feeling sort of insecure and snappish? And who knew she would like to sew so much?


My kids aren’t sleeping well these days. Fortunately, they seem to pick alternate nights. Fortunately, because if they were both in my bed at the same time I am quite sure we would have to make a trip to the ER. It’s like my husband passed along some weird ninja DNA strand that causes people to kick box in their sleep. I don’t enjoy a roundhouse to the face at 3:00 a.m., even if it is only a cute little chubby baby foot.

But I will admit that there is something really gratifying about having them crawl into our bed and fall instantly asleep. Just knowing that you provide them with that level of comfort and security. And they are pretty sweet when they get all snuggly with us.

For about 15 minutes anyway. And then, inevitably, I get punched in the face.

Mr. G is amazingly adept at sleeping through all of the hubbub. In fact, Mr. G is amazingly adept at sleeping through his alarm clock. Friday morning Mr. G was lucky not to be picking pieces of his alarm clock out of his nether regions. But that is another story altogether.

We had a scary night at our house yesterday. There was a very big fire near us. Apparently 9 houses were burned to the ground, and 10 more were damaged. A woman died in her home. The neighborhood – the whole city really – is kind of reeling today. Very sad.

We were never in danger, but it was close enough that all the emergency crews were going right past our house and driving home we could see flames. Sweet Pea was pretty freaked out. I am actually shocked that it was the baby, and not her, that ended up in our bed last night. I guess real fear doesn’t cause bad dreams. Just imaginary monsters.

But it was scary, and my heart goes out to the people who lost their homes. And to the family of the woman who was killed.


Tuesday, August 19, 2008

This is my couch. I bought it in February of 2007. I got it at a wholesale furniture place for aproximately 60% off retail. But I still paid $1100 for it. So, I assumed, it was a good couch.

Please note the SHREDDED upholstery on my 18 month old couch. Hmmmmm. Problematic. Esp. when you consider that we don't own a cat, and we don't typically use a switchblade on our sectional.

Now please read the email that I got from the manufacturer of my crappy couch, and my response to said email. (The gal from the wholesale store where I bought le couch was the one initiating the emails, so she is the "Sam" mentioned in both):


I've received the forwarded email and pictures of the sectional. Unfortunately, our warranty on the cover, whether it be fabric or leather, is 1 year from the date of purchase. It would be difficult at this point to tell whether the tears are the result of a weakness, or of heavy use by the consumer. Your customer may want to consult an upholsterer.

Natalie Radtke
Customer Service/Key Accounts
Emerald Home Furnishings



Thank you very much trying to help us get our couch repaired. We are, to say the least, extremely disappointed in the response from Emerald Home Furnishings. I am completely at a loss as to what kind of “heavy use” by us would have resulted in that small section of upholstery shredding like it has. (Since I sent you the photos there is yet another hole.) But clearly, Ms. Radtke isn’t really interested in the cause of the problem. Only that the warranty has expired and that this defective couch is now our problem.

As business owners we understand that even quality products can occasionally have unexpected problems. The companies that rise to the top are those who provide excellent customer service when their product fails.

It’s an expensive lesson to learn, but now we know not to do business with Emerald Home Furnishings.

Thank you again for your help.


Me. Pissed.

"Your customer may want to consult an upholsterer."



Please do me a favor and never buy anything from Emerald Home Furnishings. Thank you.


Friday, August 08, 2008

Some things you might want to know on this lovely Friday. Or not. Hard tellin'.

1. I can barely walk today. Thank you "Body Pump" class. My mom is fine though. BAD ASS NINJA. I'm telling you.

2. There is a new children's consignment store very close to my house. For the IdaHo's, it is in the Vista Village shopping center, and it is super cute. I took a bunch of stuff there this AM and got $38 dollars in credits. Which excites my earth mama personna, as well as my totally cheap personna. SP is excited too because she got 2 new dresses. And she is also pretty stoked about the new store being right next to "Only One Dollar!" where she somehow voodoo-hypno-tricked me into buying her a recorder. As in, shrill musical instrument. I think I was distracted by the burning in my quads. No matter though. I am probably not going to be able to get out of my desk chair for 2-3 days, and by then the novelty may have worn off.

Also at Only One Dollar were these packages of totally cool felt cutout shape delios that were worth every one of those 100 pennies.

3. John Edwards....John, John, Joooohn. I just. I just can't even go there. Stupid man.

4. I have jury duty next week, and I am FREAKING out about the potential for being chosen, even for preliminary rounds of questioning, for the sentencing portion of a death sentence case of a very violent murderer/child molestor. If you live in Idaho you probably know what I mean. The thought of even being questioned about my ability to serve on that Jury makes me want to turn to dust. FREAKING OUT. Me. Shudder.

And for the record, even though I am usually kind of wishy washy about the death sentence, in this case I think the bastard should die slowly and painfully. FOR THE RECORD. Just in case there is anyone reading my blog who might be able to pass that along.

5. I have a question. What do you do with kids clothes that are too worn/stained to be donated? I have a bin of consignment items, a bin for St. Vinnies, and a bag of rags basically. Only, I have actual rags breeding in my laundry room closet. So I don't need any more. Fabric is commonly recycled and re-used for various and sundry things, right? So...what do I do with it? I suppose I should start with calling the recycling center. But if you have an answer to this question please share. Thanky.

6. I am missing Scarlett and hope she is having a nice vacation.

7. My blogroll currently features a link to "Wooly Felt Balls" at Craft Magazine. Um...that's REALLY funny, right? Maybe I could make some for my sock monkey. Dirty Monkey.

Bonne Weekend!

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Have you peed your pants yet today? No? This should do the trick.

Except now I want to eat cake. Even if it is a butter cream monstrosity with glaring grammatical errors. Ok. But maybe not any of the ones that look like actual poo.

Here is my problem. When I’m hungry, I eat something. I my mind, the food choices I make are fairly healthy. But apparently losing your baby weight requires you to be freaking starving all the time.

So here is what I’ve had to eat today:
8:00 – One container of blueberry yogurt. No, not the all natural organic no sugar, no flavor, no chance of containing high fructose corn syrup kind. Because, quite frankly, that stuff tastes like shit. But still, it is just an 8 oz container of yogurt. So that should count as kind of healthy, right?? (Apparently I am insecure and defensive about breakfast. Interesting.)

9:45 – My stomach started growling despite the fact that I was all, “Hey stomach. You just ate yogurt. Chill.” So I had a celery stalk with some peanut butter on it.

10:15 – Still. Freakin. HUNGRY. So I ate half an English muffin with PB&J on it that Sweet Pea didn’t finish and left in the car. DUDE, how gross is that? I ate reject preschooler breakfast.

12:00 – Leftover tacos from dinner last night = 1 small tortilla, probably 2 -3 tablespoons ground beef, a medium sized pinch of grated cheese, a ton of salsa – because yum, right? And 2 tablespoons of guacamole that I made last night from fresh avocados and if we’re telling the truth I would like to just get a spoon and eat the whole freaking container.

And also I have been a good girl about the water drinking today. I bet I’ve had at least 32 oz.

It is 12:39 and I am feeling a bit peckish. WTH?

Why can’t my body just eat my ass for a while??

This is going to be hard. I did go to the gym this morning though. Here is what I learned:

My Mom is a BAD ASS NINJA. Seriously. She is back in the gym this week after having full on knee replacement surgery only 7 weeks ago. I did the “Body Pump” class with her. (She already did it on Tuesday this week, and before surgery was doing this class 3 times a week I think. PLUS a cardio workout AND swimming AND another class that is sort of a pilates/core thingo.) Anyway, let’s just say that my mom lifted as much weight as I did, if not more. And she didn’t look like she was struggling to steer her Caddy out of the parking lot. Unlike some other jello armed girl we know who thought that carrying a 20 lb. baby around all the time might mean she had some biceps.

HELLO, I carry a 20 pound baby around all the time. Why am I still so freakin’ fat??


Pity Party, table for one…


Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Today is more about the Random than it is about the Photo. Although, there will be photos!

First, two cool new blogs. These were featured as "Blogs of Note" on Blogger today. And because it is Tuesday and I am feeling random I actually clicked on the Blogs of Note and was delighted to find a couple of gems.

Crafty Synergy features artists who make all kinds of wonderful handmade things. I am especially loving the letterpress stationary and cards from Sunlit Letterpress, and the gorgeous leaf printed fabrics from Inleaf Design, and the darling softies from Creative Thursday. Not to mention that I am all kinds of jealous of how Miss Creative Thursday gets to live the life of an artist that she always dreamed of.

I think I'll add Crafty Synergy to my blog roll so that I can contribute even less at work.

The other blog I love today is It's Lovely! I'll Take It! SO. FUNNY. Oh man, this blog really gets me. It is a collection of truly bad real estate photos. And I am in love.

And now, I would like to send a big fat BITE ME to Alaska Airlines because of vacation hassles I am too tired and frustrated to even tell you about. But at the same time, I need to send a little love to the probably waaaay underpaid people at the International reservations toll free number who fixed the giant airline created screwup and gave me both a hotel voucher and some free tickets. They were lovely even when I was verging on not being so lovely. And it only took 3 calls, 3 different agents, two supervisors and about 2 hours of my time. Wheeeeee!!

And now some photos:

I believe that this is the only photo we took of ourselves this weekend. Check out how relaxed and focused we look. Because all we had to do that day was shop and eat and hang out. There is a lake very nearby and none of us is worrying about whether or not the fruit of our looms is going to fall in, eat dirt, get a sunburn, etc. We are so blissed out we don't even care that this is probably a terribly unflattering angle to take a picture from. And I think we look good!

And this is the J page from the ABC Book. I think it's cool.


Monday, August 04, 2008

I am so freaking embarrassed at my neglect of this blog. I can’t even really think up a good reason why. And at one point I was actually keeping a list of things to write about…someday….

So, no excuses. Except for that we have been having lots of fun. Family and otherwise.

This past weekend was my “Girls Only” trip to the mountains, and it was wonderful. I can’t say that there is any one thing that warrants an entire blog post. But, you know, it was girl weekend. There was laughing, and relaxing, and shopping, and brownies and butterscotch s’mores, and chocolate with bacon in it. (Really!) And red wine. Oh, and also the most fabulous dirty martini that I have ever had in my life. So yum.

It’s funny how girl weekends are so organic in nature. We had no plan. No itinerary. I didn’t even plan a menu or grocery shop until we got there. (So unlike me!) And yet it felt like there wasn’t enough time to do it all. We needed a week, but after two days we were ready to hold our husbands and our babies again. Someday I’ll convince Mr. G to load the kids up and come to me in paradise instead of heading back down the hill of reality. Le sigh.

Our shopping excursion resulted in a couple of share worthy finds. I bought a pair of shoes that were totally out of the price range in which I usually shop. (Breathe. Breathe.) It made me realize that I am totally CHEAP. And that good, comfortable shoes are something worth paying for. I bought these Dansko Giselle shoes in red:

***Blogger seems to be having some trouble with image uploads right now. I'll try again later, but you can see them here if you're that interested.***

I am wearing them today with a denim skirt. So far I have successfully shushed the voice in my head that is saying “only children and whores wear read shoes.” Because how lame is that? Red shoes rock. I have a mental picture of me in comfortable jeans and a sweater this winter. On my feet are stripey socks and these shoes. I think I look great in that J. Crew meets Grateful Dead meets Dorothy Gale kind of way. Plus they are cute sockless. Even though sockless is a personal boundary stretcher for me.

Uh, I mean, I am uncomfortable going sockless with closed toe shoes. Because of the whole sweaty feet thing. I don’t mean like the lady I saw today who was wearing a short skirt, high heeled sandals, and those little ankle bootie nylons. But she wasn’t speaking English, so we are just going to chalk that up to cultural differences.

I also bought The Apron Book because I have a newfound obsession with cute vintage looking aprons, and I am constantly saying, “I could SO make that.” Which is either evidence that I am cool and creative. Or just further evidence that I am cheap. Whatevs.

And I got a bunch of ideas for cute wall hangings I could make using pictures from my grandmother’s scrapbooks. Again, creative? Or just too cheap to buy things made by other people? Hmm.

The really good news here is that I have been toying with the idea of doing a giveaway here. And I think that in the next few days I’ll be giving away either an apron, or a totally awesome if not original vintage photo wall hanging.

Are you all a-tingle? Good!

In the meantime, I posted a recipe for Cedar Plank Salmon on The Kitchen Mirror. We had that for dinner on Friday and everyone loved it. (Well, everyone who ate it. We had a vegetable-arian with us. She does not eat anything that once had a mother. Which I find both noble and terrifying. And has resulted in me obsessing about having a few more meatless meals in my summer cooking repertoire.) Anyway, this recipe always makes people think I am far more skilled in the kitchen than I really am. So you should try it and let everyone tell you how amazing you are too.