Monday, February 16, 2009

It’s February, and you know what that means? I bought new underpants, and now we’re going to talk about them!! Woohoo, I know you’re SO excited to discuss my knickers.

So I got some of these:

Ok, not exactly these. Mine are cuter. Pink with lavender trim and vice versa. I was going to take a picture of them, but that seemed weird. I mean, I wasn’t wearing them or anything. In fact they hadn’t been worn yet at all. Still weird though, right? So you’ll just have to imagine the cute colors. It makes them look all retro. Less Granny.

But helloo….SO COMFORTABLE. And bonus they were on super sale. 60% off the lowest clearance price. I am so in love with my new skivvies, in fact, that I did a Google search for “retro lingerie” to see if I could find more.

And what is important about that, dear readers – hello…readers? Are you there? Can you hear me over the sound of your head banging into the wall? Seriously, I’m done talking about my own personal underpants now. I’ve moved on to lingerie in the more universal sense. Ok? Do you need a brain wipe? Ahem. Anyhoo…I found this really cool collection of retro looking lingerie. Like pinup girl material.

So fun! And now, I am a little fixated on just who it is who buys (and presumably wears) this kind of thing.

I mean, I don’t even have a matching set. My rule has always been underpants have to be cotton, but bras cannot be cotton because they itch. And black cotton jockeys with a grey bra doesn’t count. (Oh, sorry, that was about me again…my bad.)

Moving on.

So if one were to own some fancy lingerie like this, hypothetically speaking of course. When would one wear it? Underneath stuff? Or just on surprise birthday trips to Vegas for hotel nookie? (Hypothetically.) I’m thinking my garter belts would be gathering a lot of dust.

So if you are a totally liberated lingerie wearer please inspire me. And if you aren’t living with 2 small children who have not yet embraced the cat bell, give me a timeline on when I can hope to unleash my inner calendar girl.

(Can we get some smelling salts in here? I seem to have lost a few faithful Clover followers. Brian…? Jim…? Dad…? It’s over now. You can open your eyes.)



jmac said...

Once they're in school full time, your lingere loving lucious self will come back to ya...mama!
I wear pretty stuff all the time..under my clothes..just makes me feel nice. And if he gets a peek afterhours...all the better!!

Sara Joy said...

ooo I would buy that stuff!! Yes, for under things and yes for hotel sex in Vegas :)

I mean, I wouldn't hook up garter belts under gym clothes or for the office every day, but I love pretty lingerie. I have little boobies so I don't have to worry about structural bras and things that are heavy-duty, I just get to pick out pretty things. I'm already stocking up for the honeymoon.

scarlett said...

Hmmm, I feel very old. Maybe I need some of that lingere. I would love to tell you when you can release your inner self but I have yet to find out. I think it was easier when they were toddlers well, okay so your way tired but now if they happen to get up what do you say??!! I mean scarred for life! Not to mention you might be the talk of the playground...yeah dealt with that a few weeks ago. No not me...another poor mortified mom who found out kids were talking about her and chocolate syrup. Yeah I do not get paid enough to talk to 4th graders about their parents sex life!!! Any hoo if you get a good answer let me know. I guess we are lucky we are married to kerby boys because ya know...burlap sack would turn them on! ooo, my word verification says reesses..does that mean recess or chocolate and peanut butter? either one sounds fun!